Oh. My. God. I’m absolutely blown away.

Okay, honestly I agreed to review the Lelo Ora for the novelty. Lelo makes a damn fine line of products, but this one was so bizarre that I had to see it for myself.

It’s an oral sex simulator. A tiny pussy licking robot tongue. It’s almost spooky to watch the little disembodied tongue tip swirl around in a circle underneath the surface.

It’s shaped more like a bangle bracelet than anything. It’s rounded, the controls are on one side, the tongue area on the other. It’s actually the perfect shape to hold between your legs, totally hands free.

As with the other toys by Lelo, this one has several different speeds and settings, and is fully rechargeable. The “tongue” goes either around in a full circle, or in a half circle,accompanied by different strengths and patterns of vibrations. After playing with the settings awhile, I decided I would really have liked an up and down motion as well.

This is a toy to inflict on the very, very bad (or very, very good). It’s pure foreplay, and not just sorta-getting-warmed-up kind. This is the full blown, panty soaking, begging for sex type of foreplay. Two minutes in and I’m dripping wet and dying for a good fucking, I’ve never had that with a sex toy before. This would be the perfect toy for tying someone up, ordering her to hold it between her thighs, and then coming back in five or ten minutes to a quivering, wet mess, ripe for fucking.

So what does it really feel like? Not quite like a real tongue, I don’t think I’d ever mistake it for one. It’s more of a gentle, roving pressure, maybe like a light swipe of a finger. Coupled with the powerful vibrations, it doesn’t fall into that numbing, droning type of toy that you numb to in a matter of minutes. It’s exciting, there’s a little anticipation there while you wait for the next pass.

Could I come from this? So far, no, but that’s not a deterrent in the least. (My partner has an oral fetish, so the bar is set *very* high.) This has some super strong foreplay mojo. Use it either by yourself to finish off with a different toy, or to get revved up for that special someone.The Ora is in a class all its own.

If you wouldn’t mind buying this using my affiliate link, I’d love you forever :)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Let’s back up to August. *pushes time machine button.*

Every so often Lelo contacts me to ask if I want to review something. Of course my answer is always a resounding “Hell yes!” So they sent me their new Gigi 2. When I opened it, there was a very minor defect, and of course I let them know about it. It’s fine, it’s a new product, things need to get worked out. No worries. They have amazing customer service and they took care of it.

Between the time I sent the defective one back and the time they sent me a new one, I was in a car accident. I totalled my car, it was a high speed accident, and I was very, very lucky to essentially walk away from it. (The other guy is okay too.) I wasn’t totally injury free, I fucked up my knee and my right hand, but neither injury needs more than lots of time to heal.

It’s been nearly a month, I am bored as fuck with all this recovery stuff. I spend lots of time watching Netflix. I can’t really write very long *cue sad violin music* and writing this will make my hand ache all day.

When you’ve been hurt for real, writing or thinking about BDSM is seriously unappealing, so my book has been on hold. The point I’m spiraling towards here is that I haven’t masturbated more than a couple times in the whole preceding month. I usually masturbate a couple times a day when I’m in full sex writing mode. I’ve lost touch (all puns intended) with my body.

Enough with the pity party, on to the review:

So last night, I’m looking at the box for my replacement Gigi 2. It’s been sitting on my desk, unopened this whole time.

“Fuck it,” I thought, “I could go for a wank,” and finally opened the box.

The Gigi 2 is designed to be a g-spot vibe. It’s small, one end is flat. As with most Lelo products, there is a nifty little control panel that’s easy to use and figure out. To access a different mode, you push up or down. To access speed/strength, you push to either side.

Like I said up above when I told my tale of woe, my right hand is kind of jacked up. Gripping things for a long time sucks, so holding on to a regular vibe is really out of the question for now. Here’s where I fell in love with the Gigi 2:

The Gigi 2 is tiny. It’s very slender and short. It’s super light, you could tuck this in a purse and never know it was there. It’s also rechargeable. No batteries to mess around with, just a charger that comes with it.

I slid it in and found a setting I liked…and then I let go. I was able to gently cross my thighs and hold it in that way. Hands-free!

This is not a girthy toy at all, it doesn’t need to be. It’s just long enough that the controls are on the outside and are totally accessible. It’s also just long enough that I could push it in and find that sweet spot, you know the one…where it almost hurts from being in too far, but doesn’t really.

I wiggled around a bit, found a comfortable position and came like a motherfucker almost immediately.

It was fucking lovely, my whole body was all “Whoa, oh hey orgasm, I remember you!” and it was a beautiful experience. I am very much looking forward to our next rendezvous.

To recap: I love the Gigi 2 because it is seriously easy to use and packs a hell of a wallop with very minimal effort on my part. It’s incredibly light, probably the most portable sex toy I own. This one has earned it’s place next to my bed.

For today’s post, a representative from Lelo asked me to review their new product, the Tor II. Lelo provided the product for review. 

The box arrives, sleek, black and modern, as if it were designed by Apple. We open it to reveal a cock ring and a small charger.

The Tor II is small enough to fit in the palm of my hand. My partner looks skeptical. The finish is pleasing, luxuriously silky to the touch.

“I don’t think I’m going to fit in that,” he says, holding it up.

“It’s really stretchy,” I say hopefully. I plug it in to charge and press one of the buttons on the side.  It makes a low whrrrrrrrr sound.

“Oh.” I’m disappointed. I can barely feel it vibrate.Then I press the button on the side again. And again. I click it a few times, as high as it will go. It nearly vibrates off my hand.

“OH!” I say, shoving it down the front of my panties, “This is nice!” Continue reading →